Resilient Living #2 – January 22, 2026
I wrote my last post on November 30, 2025. I was proud of it. I felt strong. Peaceful, even. I talked about protecting my energy, setting boundaries, breathing through the heavy rooms. I hit publish and went to bed feeling like I’d finally found my footing after almost 6 years of grief.
The very next morning, I lost my chosen brother of over 30 years. Mike Cannon. Fatal heart attack. Gone.
I’m not going to sugarcoat it: my life fell the fuck apart.
Somewhere in the blur of Mike’s passing came more blows—a lifelong friend lost her mom (I was helping care for her), we had Mike’s service, financial scares for his four living kids, the holidays hit like a freight train, work was nonstop (35 team members, planning the season, catching up from last), Faith got her license, both my parents who live with us were hospitalized… I could keep going, but you get the picture.
I’m not complaining. Life is busy busy fucking busy for everyone right now. I’m just saying: I had to dig deep into my soul—fast. I prayed. I meditated. I looked at myself long and hard and picked me apart. I’m not new to loss. After losing a child, nothing compares. But this one hurt so bad—heart in my throat, stomach in knots, energy drained.
And yet… Mike showed up. Immediately.
He’s been with me in and out ever since. 444 everywhere—clocks, receipts, tags, addresses. Birds—oh my god, the birds. He used to send me pictures of birds all the time. I’d tease him: “Mike, every bird isn’t a sign!” Now the trail cameras on the hunting property are blowing up—4 or 5 different breeds in a two-foot space, almost like he’s mocking me. His sense of humor hasn’t changed one bit.
He’s stronger on the other side than most people ever get here. His spirit was ready. He’s visited people in dreams—beautiful, healthy, no suffering, happy. Everyone says the same thing, without knowing the others’ dreams. He hasn’t come to me in dreams yet, but he’s here—a whisper away instead of 30 minutes or a text.
I’m so thankful for the 30+ years we had together—the highest highs, the lowest lows. I’m thankful for my work team that pulls together when tragedy strikes any of us. I’m thankful I’ve been on this spiritual awakening for almost six years—all the knowledge I’ve gained, the techniques to calm my nerves without alcohol or drugs. I’m thankful, even in one of the hardest losses I’ve ever faced, I’m thankful.
Mike was there the day we found Alex. He sat with us at the funeral. He mourned with me. He helped any way he could. Then he lost his oldest son, Lil Mike, three years later. We walked this bereaved-parent path together—holding each other up, searching for signs, learning our angels stay close.
I wasn’t worried about Mike’s soul when I got the news. I know he’s on the other side with Lil Mike, his dad, and all the loved ones waiting. He’s ready. He’ll let us know he’s close—and he already is.
He noticed the 4:44s all the time—texting me screenshots when he saw them, especially when thinking about Lil Mike or his dad or making a big decision. 444 means angels surrounding you with love and protection, a powerful reminder you’re on the right path, supported every step. He got it. He understood we’re creators of our lives—guided, but with free will. Mike chose to be a good man. And he was.
I miss him physically more than words can say. But I know he’s better than we can imagine. I’m thankful for every year we had. I’m thankful for my work team. I’m thankful for the awakening I’ve had—and for Mike walking part of it with me.
And here’s the miracle: I’m happy. As happy as a grieving mother and “sister” can be. Sobriety gave me clarity. Learning gave me peace. I’m thankful for my time with Mike and Alex – not angry, not anymore, not in a long time.
It’s been almost two months since my last blog, but I’m back—with even more to share than I had before. Not getting rid of me yet. I can’t wait to keep sharing what’s worked—because if it helped me, it can help you.
Your Turn
Your Turn: What keeps you going when life hits hard again? Comment below—I read every one.
Next: “The Morning Routine That Saved My Peace (Again)”
#LiveMoreLikeAlex #ResilientLiving #GriefAndBrotherhood #444 #WeAllWeGot #BereavedFamily